so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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