is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
