I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
