ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
