I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize