I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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