Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i would punch a child for taco bell
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
