Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
