I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize