apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
