Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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