I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Randomize
