He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
i now understand why vodka
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
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