Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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