I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
