Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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