Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize