Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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