the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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