He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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