is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
you had me at cake vodka
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
