That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
