OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Randomize
