Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize