In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
