i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
