i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
