I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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