At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize