i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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