is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i just had sex bonerless
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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