i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
