I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
