Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i wish my penis had a tongue
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
