mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
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