She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
