Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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