Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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