Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
