I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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