Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
