I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize