Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
