Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize