You don't have asthma, your pregnant
how can u be prego again
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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