kristin has been a bad kristin
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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