I forgot how hot balto sounded
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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