I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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