i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
