No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
PANTIES FOUND
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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