its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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